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Marriage freely becomes a fashion. It is popular that adult to love freely and marry freely in many big cities and towns. The new wedding model is easier than before. They exchange the ring as engaged before their wedding, and almost make a dinner party in hotel instead of at home. The bride and groom need not to perform a know-how but perform three bows to their parents, witness a wedding and officiate as wedding. They also take wedding dresses photos in wedding dress store or outside before their wedding.
Socrates to choose which to choose than in the wheat fields, “the most full of wheat.” In fact, everyone should be for the ever-growing “wheat”, both before and after marriage. Faced with the choice of options, in the face of a culture of conflict and mingle with, Sino-US transnational marriage couples should be so.
 
III. Reasons of the Differences in Marriage Cultures between China and America
There are many differences of marriage between China and America. Why the differences could come into existence? The answers are as follow:
3.1 Gender Roles of Marriage in Traditional America and Ancient
Husband-wife relationship is inaccurate to say that the traditional husband-wife relationship is a relationship between two individuals. Or it should be like that, it is a relation sets by customary rules of culture. Generally speaking, the core of the relationship between complies shot their emotional life, but the guarantee and duties of each. They must fulfill their duties and cooperate in a diversion of labor, working together to do keep the house hold going it has been clear from long ago which things should be done by men, which by women, and which by either men or women. Rationally, productive activities-duchy as wage labor outside should all be done by men, cooking, feeding children, changing clothes washing nappies and pouring out the chamber-pot, was the wife’s role in both countries.
3.1.1 Traditional Roles of Wife in Ancient China
In ancient China, women were taught to domestic roles-cooking. Cleaning, and giving birth in centuries gone by.
“A woman was considered nice if she had not committed any major misdeeds”. Society back then did not look favorably on educated woman. Woman in feudal society were expected to live by the “tenets of obedience and the four virtues” women were required to obey they fathers and brothers before marriage, their husband during marriage and their sons if they were widowed. The four virtues were felicity, physical charm, good manners and efficiency in needlework.
Families in feudal China were structured in accordance with the political system, laws, moral standards and idiocies.
Wives were often addressed as “someone’s family member” or “children’s mother” But in fact Confucianism stood for a society with emphasis on distinction between superiority and inferiority. It stood for obedience for recognition of authority in a family as in a state. Wife was given an “equal” position with husband somehow, below the husband.
Han Chinese women had the custom of going into confinement for a month after childbirth. This custom is related to patriarchal culture. People think that women’s menstrual blood is unclean, and their bodies are polluted after childbirth, and are afraid of angering the spirits and calling disease or disaster upon themselves. Before the baby has reached one month old, the mother cannot leave the room in which she gave birth. Her mother-in-law or her natal mother or sister-in-law brings her food to her. The cultural meaning of this is to play down the significance of childbirth. But in fact it also reduces the new mother’s workload, giving their bodies a chance to recover after childbirth. The custom of confinement is still common today, but the fear of angering the spirit has weakened, and young people do not know the origin of the custom, merely that it is a necessary measure in order for the mother’s heath to recover.
The treatment of new mothers during the period of confinement depends on the economic condition of the household.
After land reform in the 1950s, the household had more land and the government promoted the idea of male and female equality. So women were mobilized to take part in more labor activities, and many women also began to go to the fields to plant and harvest. During the collective period, in which income was distributed according to work points, most able-bodied women were taking part in agricultural and other production activities. However, changes in women’s roles in production did not lead to corresponding changes in the division of labor between women and men regarding household duties. Rural women still carried out all the household tasks that were traditionally regarded as women’s tasks. Thus they had mot only to earn work points to feed their families, but also to undertake the tiring tasks of feeding and clothing the whole family. Some women, finding they too busy, would task their husbands to help look after child or cook. But other Villagers would laugh at men who often did these tasks. Even in the 1990s, pouring out the chamber pot was still the wife’s task. In general wife would only ask her husband to “lose face” and the wife would become the topic of others’ gossip.
3.1.2 Traditional Roles of Husband in America
The biblical idea about husband is that husband is the head. He is the ultimate authority within the home for all decisions. God asks a man to be the head of the family doesn’t mean a woman is looked down on. However vice, the Lord’s will is, a man must take the mail responsibility of a family. Husband is the head that means be is the leader, provider and protector in the family.
The husband feels a strong sense of responsibility to make money and provide what is needed for the family. The husband has also traditionally been seen as the disciplinary of a family and he has the responsibility to make to final decisions for their home. A wise husband will seek his wife’s opinion and respect her opinion even if he must decide against her opinion. The husband is to love the wife, provide for her, and protect her.
3.2 The Effect of Educational Traditions
The differences of cultural traditions are the roots of the differences of educational traditions, which make the differences of cultural traditions exist and strengthen. Our traditional culture has considered the Confucianism as the leading place since Chun-Chill. Tone in with people and society’s relationship has already dominated the execution of education. The educational tradition created by it has been controlling people’s thought. However, the western educational traditions pay more attention to people’s development and ability’s cultivation. This characteristic also has a long historical process. Special education on the history of Chinese parents, with the noble spirit of molding people with outstanding works to inspire people, and Chinese history and culture deeply influenced by the tradition of every family. In the United States the family and moral education, religion played a role should not be underestimated. In modern society, parents still hope that God has always been common in the isolated heart of the unity of mankind together.
In fact, there are also many similarities between Chinese and western educations. As a tradition, there is no one better or worse. Which was born in a given cultural background and it were the products of certain cultures. Only in the original soil that can judge its degree of suitability. The educational traditions of the soil mostly are complemented in many aspects, and borrow ideas form each other to perfect continually.
3.3 Influences of Economical Factors in Marriage
Research strongly and consistently indicates that marriage is a wealth building institution. Married people typically earn and save more than their unmarried counterparts. And it is not just the joining of resources and energies that create this financial benefit, but the permanence of marriage itself. The wealth accumulation in cohabiting situations is far below what is typically is in marriage,
With cohabiters more closely resembling the earnings and savings of sings of singles. While the poverty rate for children linings in married households is about 6 percents, it is 31 percents for children in cohabiting homes, much close to the 45 percents for Children living in single parent families.
3.3.1 Affluent Economy in America
The major effect of the economy on marriage relates to how many women work outside the home and the necessity for them to close. Today’s high cost of living in America forces many wives (even those who prefer not to work outside the home) to work outside the home. The constant message from advertising is that the family needs more material things in order to be happy. And because of the development of their lift, the higher level of their needs, they are aware of being in rich are the way if making marriage better, they make money for a better life. This causes many married couples to seek higher income levels to afford things that are not essential to the family’s needs. Americans are willing to buy things, especially in the bedroom and the car, eat or drink and, in particular, is a banquet, the more “Jewish” and the Chinese people are more willing to spend money on a banquet area.
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